I WANT TO PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE WHEN..
A cow wearing skates is my kinda cow! Confused? Read on –
I love my husband, I really do (and believe it babe, I know your reading this!). I love how he is our protector and works hard so that we don’t go without. He is super dooper caring, considerate, calm, generous, a wonderful husband, a great dad to our kids and being a paramedic, he is handy to have around in a crisis situation because god knows I fly into panic mode most of the time. He is the all round Mr Nice Guy – Everybody Loves Adam – its true!
But behind that Mr Nice Guy – Everybody Loves Adam facade are some highly irritating habits. Habits so irritating that when I am faced with one, I really want to punch him in the face. I would never seriously punch him in the face – he has had two surgeries on that nose, we don’t want to mess with that. But these habits just really grate on my nerves and I swear the less patience I have the more irritating they are!
I want to punch him in the face when –
● He sneezes – oh lordy! Could he possibly sneeze any louder?? He has absolute no volume control over his sneezes what so EVER. I kid you not, you could hear him across the street! He claims “he can’t help it, and you just need to get used to it” – Honey, ain’t no one getting used to that fog horn of a noise.
● Blowing his nose – see above. Its fog horn number 2. I get that sometimes you really got blow and he does get sinus problems, but every dam time? Surely his nose isn’t that blocked up all the time, I mean he did have surgery to fix it! I need to start wearing ear muffs as a safety precaution I think.
● He is never in a hurry – like ever! I don’t get this, I really don’t. He is so laid back and calm that he doesn’t seem to run on my timer that is permanently set to “hurry the F**K up – we have got to go!!” Sometimes he really needs to put a rocket up his butt and put some skates on. I hate being late, and his idea of on time is totally different to mine.
● Hanging out the washing – before you all hit me with “at least he is doing washing and hanging it out – be grateful” type of talk – I am grateful. Is just that he hangs it up all over the line, in no clear order and it drives my OCD habits crazy. Lets not talk about peg marks in the middle of clothes and the way he pegs things – good grief he needs a lesson
Despite these 4 minor irritating habits, I love him. He is my best friend and I couldn’t imagine life with out him. I can’t wait till we grow old together and maybe then I will be deaf so I won’t be able to hear his out of control sneezing and nose blowing.